Allow me to introduce myself.

My name is Anton Pilgram and the portal you are looking at is one of my most beautiful works. Well, I'm sure you'll admit that it is.

Even though I work mainly in Austria and Hungary, Brno is my hometown, and that is why I decided to give the local councillors the nod for this job. It was not an easy job. It took a hell of a lot of time to carve all the statues and stonework out of stone. And then those greedy, obnoxious, gutless, arrogant bastards decided to pay me far less for the job than we had agreed.

And what's more! They wanted me to throw them a feast to celebrate the opening of the new town hall gates. For the few gold pieces they finally gave me. Oh, dear. So I climbed up the scaffolding one last time that evening and adjusted one of the phials so that it was crooked. In short, so that all of Brno could see what crooked men run their city. As soon as the fial was finished, I packed a few plums and headed for Vienna. Sichr ist sichr.

They say the councillors have got it all very well. I'll be damned if they didn't, with the whole town laughing at them!

And they wanted to fix the phial. They paid a stonemason to straighten it out, but in the morning it was just as I had carved it. A miracle or something.

And what do you think, have they improved? Mushrooms with vinegar. You will know that the Brno councillors are starting to fulfil their promises when the portal's fialia straightens up on its own.

And so far, as far as I know, it is still crooked to this day.